A Note to Ava from Momma (San Diego, CA)

Dear Ava,

You are a miracle or in Spanish it is milagro! A miracle is something that is unlikely. I will tell you that the love that your mommy, papi, and I have for you, the love that our family and friends have for you, and the love that YOU ARE, is indeed a miracle! The love that you exude is infectious. Random strangers have often asked to hold you and everyone says how much life they see through your eyes. You open our hearts and fill it with love. I am often asked if I will give birth to our next child, to your future brother or sister, and I quickly say no. Not because I don’t want to know that experience but because I want him or her to come from the exact same place you did.

Before you were born, I did not know what to expect, and then the moment I saw you, I instantly feel in love and experienced great fears at the same time. Were you going to breath? Were you too cold? Were you in pain when they pricked you with the needles? I was scared to even touch you. I just wanted to protect you. Then the first time I put my hand on your head and told you that I loved you, all of my fears went away. You gave me peace. I hope to always protect you from all the fears in this world, including my own. You will teach me, being the peaceful warrior that you are.

As you grow up, I will want to protect you from other people’s fears. I know you will learn how to protect yourself.  I just can’t help to wonder if anyone will ever make you feel bad because you have two moms? I wish I could change people’s fears about gay people and gay parents. There are some people who are not afraid of us. Like I said, you are surrounded by an army of loved ones. Together, with this army, we will strike down fear when we see it and replace it with the love and peace you have shown us. Please never be afraid to tell me anything, especially when someone makes you feel bad, I will remind you of how great you are, and we will teach them the lessons of the peaceful warrior. Someday, your friends may even wonder why they can’t have two awesome moms too J You are the biggest light and love that we know; you are our leader! Ava, I am the luckiest person in the world to have you as a daughter; you are my peace on earth, my milagro.

Love always,

Momma